Tuesday, September 26, 2006

I woke up with a squirrel on my face...

Communication - how do we talk to each other? I know what I mean when I talk to you. Do you know what you mean when you talk to me? Are you sure that I'm understanding you correctly? How would you find out? I was in the Ed Room today and I heard someone say, "I woke up with a squirrel on my face". What does that mean? Is that code for something? The person then went on to say that "Squirrel" was her cat. OK, now I get it. You should be careful when talking in "code". Your friends may get it. The people around you may not get it. This is how rumors get started. How do we interpret what people are saying to us? Body language and voice inflection. When I have spoken to you in a foreign language during class, you use the faculties that are available to you. Such as gesturing or the urgency or volume of my voice. It's funny that from one language and culture to the next, body language is interpreted differently. Standing close to people is rude in one culture and then customary in the next. How do you know what to do? When we begin to learn language as young children, we mimic what we hear and then later put meaning to it. We learn by doing. If you want to be an effective communicator, you have to practice. Ask for responses while communicating. When someone communicates something to you, repeat it back to them, to show that you are interested in what they are saying and that you understand them. It’s amazing how such a simple thing can clear the way for effective communication. I began doing this in my business dealings and it has served me well.
There is the potential for major miscommunication when dealing with customers or coworkers who are emotional, irritated or upset. You have to get to the root of the problem. Asking them to calm down is not usually the best option. That will usually make them more upset. Let them “vent” for a minute. It won’t hurt you and will probably help start the communication flow. Once the problem has been communicated to you, repeat it back to them and ask; is that what you meant? If not, then that will be the other persons cue to attempt to explain more carefully. This avoids frustration on your part and whomever you are dealing with. When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen. Ernest Hemingway

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Testing 123

1:19 PM  
Blogger Mckenzie said...

I think that communication is one of the biggest keys in life. You need to listen to what people say before you talk. My boyfreind and I have recently been victems of misscomiunication. In order to have a healthy relationship you need to communicate. Communication also is the key to lots of things in the world. It could mean the diffrence between war and peace.

1:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree with everything that you said in the blog. I am know as the go to person for a lot of my friends whenever they have a problem and need to talk. I am told that the reason for this is because I am a good listener and do not judge. It is important to know when to give advice and when to just listen. Whenever someone comes to me I will listen to their problem and then ask, "Ok, do you want my advice or where you just wanting to vent". My friends know that if they ask for my advice then I will give them a straight foward answer but if they were just wanting to vent, nothing they say will ever be brought up or held against them. This is something that I value about myself and because of this quality I am never without someone who is willing to listen to me and give me the same respect.

1:26 PM  
Blogger _Dubz_ said...

Paying attention to people while there speaking is a skill that has to be learned. Most people can just sit and stare into the clear space in a room while "pretending" to listen to someone. Now when it comes to speaking in "code" listening is not the most important part. Because the person who you are conversating with already knows what you are speaking of. So speaking in code is not a real big problem to me as long as you are among friends, or co-workers that understand you. When it comes to real life situations "code" speaking might not be the way to go. For the simple reason that you want everyone to grasp the concept you are tyrig to get across.

1:26 PM  
Blogger Edgar Tamayo aka. "DA BOY PEPPER" said...

Communication is very important in our society. Everyone experiences some sort of miscommunication with other people. Much misunderstanding happens here in school with instructors and their students. For example, class and homework asignments are always being turned in incomplete or late due to miscommunication between the students and their instructors. Miscommunication happens almost everywhere. Whether it's at you job, school, or work, making sure people understand what you're saying is very important. Many rumors do start due to miscommunication. In a society filled with metaphors and other things used to substitute for other things, it is very important everyone else knows what your're trying to explain.

1:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cummunication is the key to success!
people need to listen to others and make sure that they have understood what was said(feed back)specially for those of us that have kids, from an early age we need to show our kids how to better communicate and give them examples of miscomunication errors. miscommunicarion can be part of divorce.

1:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think its okay when you do code because if the person with kids and bad mind. There is alot of missed understanding about alot of things in this world.
If you try to talk to your mate about a problem and the people could understand the problem thats not good at all.Body language there is a few of it. It's like the way you walk. The way you talk and the way you look at a person. when you are instrested in someone you should always look at them. when somebody is talking always look at them and listen to them.

1:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

when I talk to someone I want their undivided attention. If they don't give me their undivided attention then I feel like their not going to understand what I'm saying and they're not going to give me a proper answer that I'm looking for. When people don't listen when I talk to them I get very frustrated and irratated. Then when I get mad I shut down and don't want to talk to anyone, I know that is not a good thing to do, but that's just the way I am. When you have a conversation with someone you need to finish the conversation with no questions that are left unanswerd or the other party doesn't understand, because then that's what causes hard feelings and rumors.

11:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

~annie

This is so true...people really don't take the time out to really listen to what you have to say...but I must admit that I am also guilty of this...sometimes I just wander off into my own thoughts when I'm really suppose to be listening to that other person...c'mon everyone is guilty of doing this every now and then...and yes, sometimes I do get irritated when I know that someone isn't listening to what I'm saying and trust me I really don't enjoy repeating myself, but when necessary I repeat myself just so I know that I have their attention...Communication is how we understand eachother, ourselves, and everyone around us...


~annie

8:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think that communication is one of the most valuable skills to learn, but one of the hardest to master. The reason being is that every person will interpret what you say differently. Learning how to speak effectively involves many factors. Things like clarity, simplicity, and mirroring the person to whom you are speaking are all learned. Slang words and terminology also vary from social group to group. The wording used when gigging witcha homeboys is generally different from the form of speech articulated when conversing with a prospective employer. Even the way you speak to your mother is different from the way you talk with your spouse. Ya dig? Being able to harness these skills make you a more valuable, as well as effective communicator. Rock on and live it up, if you know what I mean.

For sho!

Chris Christopherson

1:09 PM  

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